Sunday, 4 October 2009

In which our bank redeems itself

So about an hour after finding out there is yet another form, and I am promised it is IT, Hub tells me our lender is sure I am going to go crazy and has said she will bring the form to us. You bet you are I said!
So a few hours later she is in our kitchen, with 'The Last Form' I beg her not to kid with me. I am 7 months pregnant, which is 9 months for a normal sized pregnancy, and we are in the kitchen, wink.
Yes, absolutely, it is it.
I won't hold my breath until settlement on the 16th.
The following day we will all be putting on gumboots and driving to our land to explore. I am sure at least 2 children will fall in the creek, so I will also be taking a change of clothes for them all, and towels.
And the way I am walking right now, which my Hub so lovingly told me the other day, was like a duck, I will take a change for me too.

I am having moments of 'over it' already. This baby already feels the size of a toddler. I am huffing as I roll over in bed, and whinging about organs and lungs being squashed.
But I am trying to embrace this pregnancy. It is our last. Which makes some of our friends laugh, but I remind them, I never said this about the other pregnancies.
This time, is the first time I have had 'that' feeling. The 'we are done, no more babies' feeling.
I am happy about it, and a touch sad.
Happy that we will be moving on to the next stage of our lives. But sad that I will never feel a baby inside me, or give birth, or be the first person my baby looks at when they open their eyes and focus for the first time as a fresh newborn, slimey and lovely in my arms.

Don't worry, I know it is not all awwwwww and cute and lovely. There is copious amounts of wee and poo and changing, feeding through the night, and the list goes on. I guess I just don't focus on those much now we have had a handful of children. I know how quickly baby becomes toddler, and child. I want to enjoy it all, and take as many photos as I can as my memory will fade, no matter how hard I try for it not too.

My eldest child now has an email address. He emails me and his Dad. He is how I know my memory will fade. It still amazes me how fast time has gone. It really does seem like yesterday he was a baby, just walking, starting to talk. Now he talks sooo much sometimes I will tell him to give his voice a rest, and our ears.

1 comment:

Swift Jan said...

I understand about it being your last baby. You just know dont you...
I am cherishing EVERY moment with Libby this time because she is growing so fast & she will be all grown up before I know it. Even the night time feeds I am enjoying because I get to have a cuddle :)
No wishing time away this time around!

All the best, and I hope there are no more forms!!